A Smarmy Christian

To be honest, I am one.
I am a fake.
I declare myself as a follower
Of the One who loves unconditionally
Of the One who gives unselfishly
Of the One who is gracious
Of the One who is patient and kind
I wear a badge
Made to set me apart from the rest
But I'm no different
I am not patient
I am not kind
I choose who to love
I give when it is convenient
I fail every test of faithfulness
Place me in the midst of a crowd
And you won't see me shine
Cause I am a knock-off
On the verge of  despair
I tend to forget one truth -
That the badge I have
I did not earn
I could have loved with all my heart
I could have given all I've got
I could have aced all the tests
But I still won't measure up
I am a soldier
Facing an important battle
Against myself
But I can't just back down
Not to save face
Or continue the pretense
But because I choose to
I'll carry this cross
To the end of the race
To perfection

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